Fraser Road United Church

Gander, Newfoundland

Dear ______________________________________,

Congratulations on your engagement and your decision to be married in the church.

Our Beliefs about Marriage

We believe that marriage is a gift of God through which two people make a covenant with each other, with the full intention of lifelong commitment.

We believe that Christian marriage is more than a legal transaction and involves more than fulfilling the requirements of the state, although that is a necessary component.

We believe that in Christian marriage two people professing Christian faith and claiming membership in the Christian Church make this covenant with one another and with God, affirming before family, friends and witnesses that their unity is a creation of God and is greater than the two individuals.

We believe that marriage is a communion of total persons, each of them living for the other. As with the covenant between Christ and the Church, the promise of fidelity is fundamental.

We believe that your wedding vows are central to the covenant you make before God. In these vows you will make promises to each other, to the community and to God. Because we are human beings, the possibility exists that the covenant will be broken. Nevertheless, we believe that as an act of faith and hope, men and women can enter a covenant of love with the intention of permanence.

United Church ministers are not bound to preside over weddings on request. Those for whom Christian faith is not significant may wish to arrange to be married in a civil ceremony. (Our ministers can discuss this with you and help you make choices about such a ceremony.)

Expectations

Church Attendance: (for local residents) If you have not been in regular attendance at the church, we expect you to attend Sunday services at least once a month for at least six months before your wedding. This will enable you to meet many members of the congregation and become more comfortable and relaxed in the church.

Pre-Marriage Program: Each couple married in our church is expected to participate in some form of marriage preparation program approved by the ministers. Presently, couples are required to attend three interviews (one of which is the rehearsal) with the ministers or designate(s), or to furnish some proof (a letter or certificate) that they have attended such a program within six months of the wedding. Normally both partners, the future bride and groom, are expected to be present at any interviews.

First Interview: ___________________________

Second Interview: ___________________________

Rehearsal

Rehearsals will be planned for a time which is mutually convenient for you and the minister(usually an evening or two before the wedding). Because our organist and ministers may have other commitments, it is expected that you will arrive promptly and be ready to proceed. All members of the wedding party, including non-professional photographers and parents, if they are participating, should be present at the rehearsal.

The Application Process

Your initial contact will likely be with the church secretary (256-3000), to book the sanctuary and be certain that a minister is available for your chosen date. It is essential to register your wedding and to speak to the minister well in advance of your desired date.

If you have booked your hall, ordered your cake and flowers and sent out your invitations before booking your wedding with the church and minister, you may be disappointed.

The Marriage Licence

It is your responsibility to obtain a Newfoundland and Labrador Marriage Licence. It can be obtained from:

According to provincial law, you must obtain your licence at least 4 days before the wedding, and no longer than 30 days before. You are required to bring your licence to the church secretary at least four days before the wedding. There may be a need (because of vacation time) to bring it in earlier.

When your wedding ceremony is over, the minister will give you the marriage certificate which is a part of the licence. If you wish a special one to be prepared, please obtain one and bring it to the church office with the licence (or some time after the wedding). The rest of the marriage licence will be forwarded to the provincial government.

Music

It is your decision whether or not you will have music at your wedding.

Our policy is that the Church Organist has the right to play at all weddings in the sanctuary. If after consultation with you, the organist waives this right, then someone else may be invited to play. If the Church Organist is not available, a substitute organist will be suggested.

It is your responsibility to consult with the Church Organist in plenty of time to arrange and confirm choices of music, the participation of other musicians, etc. Special rehearsal may be required with soloists, etc.

Fees and Honoraria

Presently, the following fees and honoraria apply:

These fees are payable prior to the rehearsal, and can be paid at the church office. Office hours are 8 a.m. to noon, Monday to Friday.

Photographs and Photographers

Please advise your photographer, members of your family, and guests, that taking pictures with flash equipment is only allowed during the processional at the beginning of the service, at the signing of the register and during the recessional as the wedding party leaves the sanctuary. Before and after the ceremony, people may take pictures in the sanctuary if they wish.

The use of a stationary video camera is possible after consultation with the minister. Members of the congregation may take videos without lights, but are required to remain in their places (pews) in the sanctuary.

The Bridal Party

The partners to the marriage must have attained the age of nineteen years, or sixteen years with special written parental permission.

At least two witnesses must be present for the marriage, each of the age of at least sixteen years.

From past experience, we recommend that when you are considering your wedding party, children under six years of age not be chosen to participate. They are often very unpredictable and easily bored.

Flowers and Decorations

If you are having flowers, it is your responsibility to make arrangements with the florist of your choice. (Please speak to the minister about our attempt to keep our church scent-free.) If you require access to the church for flower arranging, etc., make such arrangements through the church secretary.

Candles are your responsibility unless you are willing to use whatever candles may be available in the sanctuary. Lighted candles may not be used as aisle decorations.

No damage is to be done to church furnishings, and decorations will enhance, not detract from the service of worship. Please arrange for all such decorations to be collected as soon as possible after the wedding.

Since both confetti and rice are very difficult to clean up, neither may be used on church premises. Rice may be used outside, but bear in mind that it is hard, and can hurt when thrown.

The printing and distribution of bulletins will be your responsibility. With adequate notice, we may be able to supply you with covers at reasonable cost.

The Ceremony

THE APPROACH

MUSIC FOR GATHERING

PROCESSIONAL (Music should be chosen in consultation with the organist and/or minister.)

SOLO (Optional)

GREETING

LIGHTING OF THE UNITY CANDLE (Optional) (Mothers)

PRAYER OF APPROACH

STATEMENT OF PURPOSE

ADMONITION (This is one of the legal aspects of the ceremony)

These two persons have come here to become one in this holy union. But if any of you can show just cause why they may not lawfully marry, declare it now or hereafter remain silent.

Bride and Groom, have you come here freely and without reservation to join together lawfully in marriage?

[Couple respond individually, I have.]

HYMN / SOLO (Optional)

PERSONAL READING(S) (Optional)

THE WORD OF GOD

SCRIPTURE SENTENCES

Older Testament: Genesis 1:26-28; Ruth 1:1-8, 14-17; Song of Solomon 1:15-2:4; 2:10-14; 8: 6, 7; Isaiah 61: 10, 11; 62:3-5; Jeremiah 31:31-34; Psalms 19, 33, 63, 67, 100, 148, 149, 150

The Epistle: Romans 8:31b-39; 12:1, 2, 9-13;

1 Corinthians 13:1-13 (4-8); Galatians 5:1, 13, 14, 22-25; Ephesians 3:14-21; 5:1, 2, 8-14; Philippians 2:1-11; Colossians 3:1-4, 12, 17; 1 John 3:18-24; 4:7-12; Revelation 19: 1, 5-9; 21:1-6

The Gospel: Matthew 5:1-12a; 5:13-16; 7:21, 24-29;

19:3 - 6; 22:35-40; John 1:1-5, 9-16; 2:1-11;

15:1-11; 15:9-12

WORDS ABOUT MARRIAGE

THE MARRIAGE

INVOCATION

DECLARATION OF INTENT (Another legal part)

Before God and this congregation, I ask you, Bride and Groom, to affirm your willingness to enter this lifelong covenant, and to share all the joys and sorrows of this new relationship, whatever the future may hold.

Will you have this man/woman to be your husband/wife , and will you love him/her faithfully as long as you both shall live?

[Individual response: I will.]

AFFIRMATION OF SUPPORT

As parents of Bride and Groom, will you welcome your child's chosen partner into your family, and pledge your support and encouragement to them in their life together?

[Collective Response: We will.]

As family and friends of Bride and Groom, will you pledge your support and encouragement to them in their life together?

[Collective Response: We will.]

PRAYER

EXCHANGE OF VOWS

(A Legal and religious requirement)

In the presence of God and these witnesses,

I, Bride/Groom, join you, Groom/Bride, in life-long covenant, to laugh with you in joy, to grieve with you in sorrow; to grow with you in love; to care with you for others; to be faithful to you alone as long as we both shall live.

[Other Options}

1. In the presence of God and before these witnesses, I, Bride/Groom, take you, Groom/Bride, to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; in joy and in sorrow; to love and to cherish,

2. Bride/Groom, I commit myself to be with you in joy and adversity, in wholeness and brokenness, in peace and in trouble, living with you in fidelity and love all our days.

BLESSING AND EXCHANGE OF RINGS

In turn, each places a ring on the finger of the other saying,

Bride/Groom, I give you this ring that you may wear it as a symbol of our marriage.

THE KISS

DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE (Another legal requirement, by the power of the government of Newfoundland and Labrador)

PRAYER

THE LORD'S PRAYER

SIGNING THE REGISTER (A legal and a church requirement)

SOLO (Optional)

LIGHTING OF THE UNITY CANDLE (Couple)

THE GOING FORTH

BLESSING

PRESENTATION OF THE COUPLE

Bride and Groom , we now welcome you into fellowship as husband and wife.

The couple will turn and face the congregation.

I present . .. (You need to choose a comfortable introduction)

e.g. Mr. and Mrs. John Smith; John and Jane Smith; Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Smith; the Smiths; Jane Doe and John Smith; John Smith and Jane Doe-Smith, . . .

The congregation will greet the couple with joyful applause.

SENDING FORTH

RECESSIONAL MUSIC